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It's really hard for me to get help. Is anyone interested in challenging my core beliefs and delusions?

It's really hard for me to get help. Is anyone interested in challenging my core beliefs and delusions?

bisdaknako

Maybe edit your post with a more substantial summary of your current situations, challenges, plans etc Nothing will beat a therapist, and a lot of online advice could be dangerous.


No_End_7227

Well currently I seem to be lying to myself like it's air I need to survive. Maybe I need to be challenged to seek truthfulness in my life instead. I need to be truth telling. I want to be honest.


bisdaknako

AS I said, it makes more sense to edit the above post so everyone can read it. Give three examples of these and your reasons for these.


KilvasatLife

Then go out and seek that challenge. Who better than you? Don't go expecting anyone else to do things for you.


faye555

I didn't realize there are so many types of narcissism. Interesting. My husband is BPD with narcissistic tendencies and controlling. I'm inspired to research this. 😊


KilvasatLife

You realize that none of these are any better, right? They're all just fun-house mirror reflections of fucked up. But as to your research: get familiar with every Cluster B disorder as well as the psychopathy construct. (DSM & PCL-R) That would probably make for a good place to start.


pizza_roll_boot

i can help challenge, likely not convince. the work would still have to be yours. try sharing a core belief, and if i can challenge it, i will! :)


Affectionate_Long677

I can do that for you. Haha, like, I was meant for this post. Like people tell me I should be a therapist and I reply back oh no I couldn't stop myself from telling people things I thought might help them.... dm me. For someone who actually wants to know, I can do a good job of nicely fairly respectfully pointing out how their thinking doesn't make sense.


LizvEross

You need a psychological professional. Go see a professional therapist. A stranger on the Internet is not a good person to help you. And I say this with all of the care and compassion in the world. Because you deserve happiness, and you deserve a healthy mindset. And neither of those things can come until you get help for your mental health condition.


No_End_7227

I'm afraid to see a therapist


LizvEross

I understand that that’s a logical feeling there are some people who really shouldn’t be in the industry. But any good therapist who specializes in helping people with narcissistic tendencies is going to understand that you are a person first and that you are doing something huge by trying to fix what’s broken. Because it is a mental disorder and it can be debilitating. Just look around and find one that fits. There’s no harm in trying.


Electrical-Desk-7362

Sure. What challenges?


No_End_7227

Well I keep disassociating it's humiliating


Electrical-Desk-7362

Why? What is your worst fear? You are choosing to NOT do something & feel humiliated, what would you feel if you just did it? What is the worst thing you think could happen? And 2nd worst, and 3rd? What is the ACTUAL worst thing that could happen? 2nd, and 3rd? Self imposed fear? Inadequate response? Disassociate because your "stuck," or ? Think about perception between actual and perceived, and why you do it?


No_End_7227

My worst fear is being visible. I psychotically freak out when my mom sees me. But when I'm a different person then I am able to be seen.


[deleted]

What is the hard part about getting help?


No_End_7227

I'm just not comfortable with being wrong, taking accountability.


[deleted]

Do you realize you're wrong, and just have a hard time admitting it? Or do you justify it in your head, so you don't realize you're wrong? Will you say you're wrong, even if you don't agree with yourself?


thiscatcameback

In the past week you have submitted almost 100 POSTS, to say nothing of all the comments you have also made. First of all, I wonder if you might benefit from getting off the internet and out of your head. Second, your troubles are significant and you have many comorbid interactions, which may require something more complex and clinical than Reddit advice. You say you hesitate on therapy as you are afraid of accountability, but you are asking for that in your post, so it seems like you do need it. Like fitness and physical health, mental health is a process and a journey. You will not talk yo someone tomorrow and be cured. It will take years, with many ups and downs along the way. What is important is to start the process at your own pace, even if it is slow at first. You may need to take a leap if faith, push yourself put of your comfort zone and start the process of getting therapy. That could mean small tasks like thinking about your goals, what you need from a therapist, what kind of professional is most suitable and then start researching people available. What adjuncts to therapy you might need (meds, life changes). None iof this requires you to interact just yet. Maybe doing this will help Psych you up to take the steps. If you hit barriers, then maybe cobsider what resources can offer you support and encouragement to access therapy: family, friends, this sub, listening support lines, other forums. Etc.


No_End_7227

I'm not experiencing any type of justice. For scientology and jehovahs witness indoctrination. Or being raped by my abusive ex. I'm not allowed to get any meds, my parents are against it


thiscatcameback

What is your age?


No_End_7227

Twenty six


thiscatcameback

So why do your parents have a say in anything?


No_End_7227

Are you effing kidding me? We're not all empowered sweetheart!


No_End_7227

You know what. Recovery for me looks like hypnotherapy. Because that's what had been done for all these years even when I was in my mom's womb I bet they tortured me with a man's voice talking about hypnotherapy. Scientology. I need to get hypnotherapy for the hypnotism I went through.


thiscatcameback

Also, I am not trying to suggest that you need one particular treatment or another. I am simply saying that even if you are not ready for therapy, you can still begin the road to recovery by thinking deeply about what that looks like for you, and how you can get there over your lifetime. Then taking the baby steps that you are ready for.


No_End_7227

I'm sincerely experiencing both mortification and disintegration. All alone. Imagine one person has all these things eating them up inside, from inside. So nobody, no parent or animal or drug or anti psychotic or food or friend or music can make it stop. I feel infantalised. I can't even scream for help, I'll only scream in pain. I'm only experiencing pain, I'm not in any way reaching out for help or mercy. Part of me wants to disintegrate. Whatever the fuck I am or whatever this is deserves to bleed to death, melt into nothing and disappear. I just want to kind of do that. In terms of healing.


Calm_Objective_7729

Most of us have narcissistic tendencies in here. The question is more like, do you want to change?


No_End_7227

Yes I want to change.